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Reviewed on 12th November 2012.



By The Twang

I'm completely fucked off. Why? Because this song, well the verse especially, sounds exactly like another song and I can't think what this song is. For the past half an hour I've listened to this tedious cliched lad-rock pig flavoured shit and I still can't work out what it is. I'm gonna have to think a bit harder. Night ruiner.

"There's a whole generation on the bread-line...sinking in a sea of debt...". Yawn. Enemy-like Tory bashing social commentary. The bane of lad bands in a transitional period. A bit like cringing at the bird you fancy commenting on the American elections before she flicks back over to the Kardashians to see which part of Bruce Jenner's face has melted this week. Good grief. It's pretty much rapped as well.

There's trumpets, but not in a charming baroque kind of way. More in a raping your ears kind of way. However, it's not all bad...

The chorus is actually nice and catchy, quite surprising really considering that bit sounds exactly like Hard-Fi. The lyric, "you ain't got nothing if you ain't got love" is quite a nifty piece of philosophy, and a pleasant antidote to the political and socially charged verses. I'm sure it's meant to be like that as well, at least I hope it is. It makes me almost think that the song isn't really that bad at all but then you wouldn't slap a mackerel round your own face, even if you liked said fish. Described as a "carnival like chorus", according to the press release. Perhaps so, but on a rainy day.

As for my apparent disdain of lad rock, remember I once gave Little Man Tate a 9/10. Erroneously perhaps, but I did so. No, lad rock isn't the problem when it's done properly. Arctic Monkeys' tales of bouncers, coppers and birds from their debut will rightly become one of the most iconic albums of this century. And when they decided to go a bit dark they cleverly went all ambiguous, 'Dangerous Animals', 'She's Thunderstorms' and 'Crying Lightning' keeping their precocious wit without giving away too much. This however is a sweaty, recession lad rock horror of a social commentary that's completely unsubtle in its nauseating attempt to right the wrongs of working class life. The Twang for cabinet? Not likely.

As I reach the end of my inner tedium, the song it sounds like finally comes to me. It's 'Tomblands' by The Libertines. Absolutely the worst thing they ever recorded. Says it all.



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