By Flaming Apes Head
Tony Bliar really has Britain under his spindly thumb. In the Red corner, weighing approximately 180 lbs, representing middle class Britain, we have James "The Boredom" Blunt. With the optimism of a suicide bomber, and the charm of a young Burt Reynolds, he's one plucky little customer. In the Blue corner, weighing approximately "One at a time please", representing the youth of Leeds, we have Ricky "Eddie Izzard" Wilson. He would do anything possible to clock up a victory today, such as selling his own Grandmother, or performing oral sex on our adjudicators, a Leeds/Liverpudlian alliance known as Flaming Apes Head. Ding ding!
This is the sickening position we find ourselves in. The heavyweights of the British music scene are so inoffensive, so uninspired, so P.C. But that's the way Labour like it; they've got more Plods on the beat, and sedatives on the radio. So lets shake it up a bit. Lets call our band, "Flaming Apes Head", and write some punk music! The youth must have some anger to vent, lets be their soundtrack! Unfortunately, anger has been watered down, and punk has had its knackers chopped off. Clever aren't they, those governing types?
This two-track demo kicks off with the Teardrop Explodes-esque bassline of, "Shallow". Grooving along nicely, a ripping chorus ensues. Great! But hang on a minute, something is wrong. For a start, the guitar break is beginning to really grate, and yes, he did use the lyrics, "Stop looking at me!" on the chorus. And, shit, they've repeated this whole process twice, at the same tempo, with the same continuous melody. But I'm not one to hold grudges, let's mosey on down to track two, "It's All So Simple". This should have been the opener. Short, punchy, with some nice rhythms and melodies, it is quite a catchy little number. Nice work fellas.
Rewind! You describe yourselves as punk, but, as the Black Eyed-Peas once whimpered, where is the punk? It's all too safe. This band is obviously talented, they can write solid, catchy, well-crafted music. But why are they dwelling in this genre? To attract the emo crowd that seems to swell by the minute? And why the hell are they called Flaming Apes Head?! Cross genrelising (is that even a word?) is too difficult for most to understand, and can often sound like confusion. These guys should take a bit of their own advice, and make it, "All So Simple". Hone your vision, choose your angle, and stick to your strengths, and I'd wager the next review would be rapturous.