By Jarvis Cocker
Will there one day be a CD - a bit of Saturday night TV, even - of the best 100 songs based on the violent removal of phones from their rightful owners? Jarvis Cocker's treatment of the subject is in the category of dead-victim-tells-the-story. When the refrain 'fat children took my life' first comes, it fools you into thinking he means all the pictures in the phone. But no; and when you think you heard 'dived in the back of the cab' you didn't - it was 'died'.
So it's violent, even before we find out what the police were doing elsewhere. 'Elsewhere', a nice example of how Jarvis makes awkward words obey him, as he glides manically, sneering in the face of hopelessness, in his representation of a spirit that walks the streets of Tottenham. And he manages to turn the phrase 'so pander to your pampered little princess - of such enormous size' into a singable lyric before moving on to haunt the closing instrumental.
No one will want just one listen to this song, though some might be asking themselves why it is they want to hear it again. It's not meant to sound welcoming: Cocker's dissonant opening bellow that comes in over a basic rock drumbeat and fuzzed jangly guitar isn't an invitation to stay. But you do.