In this world I dislike a lot of things: Broccoli, Carrots, Turnips and ska-punk. All of them make me want to puke my guts out so I was obviously delighted to receive a skatastic CD in the form of Fine Apple's "Good Stuff".
I usually expect the same outcome from a ska CD. For it to be numerous different versions of Green Day's "King For A Day" repeated over and over again with the odd joke thrown in. Thankfully Fine Apple's take on the genre doesn't always go down this route.
The jokes however are plentiful with references to "tools" and "instruments" all over the shop. Now when I mean jokes I'm not talking about hilarious Bill Hick's styled comedy, which is intelligent, witty and unbelievably funny, no this is more like Bobby Davro at Blackpool pleasure beach. To quote a friend, "Bobby Davro is about as funny as testicular cancer."
Musically, at times Fine Apple do take on the typical ska formula with tracks like "El Funky Love" and "Handy Man" which I would really love if I were 14 again and wearing baggy pants and long songs. Sadly I've grown up since then and discovered music that is deep and moving. Something which these songs are not.
The band do try, with "First Impressions" being the standout track where the band's balls actually drop and they start to put a hell of a lot of emotion into their music. Sadly their balls seem to crawl back into their warm habitat and don't emerge again until the final track which sees the brass section excelling on what would have been another excellent song if it wasn't for the poor comedy lyrics being sung on top. Imagine if Jeff Buckley's "Grace" album had been called "Weiner". You get the picture.
According to some people Fine Apple are meant to be the best band in Bradford. Now they aren't bad, I've heard worse but I've also heard better with the likes of Milf and The Lockjaws kicking up a fuss around town. They also made me rant on about wieners which is a very bad thing.